Enduring the pain of the drought season.  

Posted by: The Lioness in

I am filled with so much fear and pain. Just like a little kid whose feet are shaking in her booties.

The lyrics of Elephant by Rachel Yamagata, is running through my mind..

"So for those of you falling in love, keep it kind, keep it good, keep it right.

Throw yourself in the midst of danger, but keep one eye open at night."

The decision has been made, it has not been easy at all. I haven't really prayed for strength consciously; unconsciously, the prayer is there.

I love my God. I want to live by His rules. I admit, I fall, and I tumble, but I try to get back up again. I know there are reasons why He made these rules. I fear oh Lord, mainly because, by living up to Your rules, I might lose him.

It has not been easy these past couple of months... It has been so hard to go through them, and I feel as if the Lover is slowly slipping away. I've continuously told my friends, that if it happens, it happens--I'll be okay.

I know I will be. However, I fear, it will break my already broken heart into a thousand more pieces.

He has loved me in more ways than I have ever imagined. He treats me the way I've always wanted to be treated. He does have his flaws; he tends to be anti-social at times, whereas, I am not.

The Lord has His ways, and these I must not question. I am just so scared Lord. I am sorry for feeling this, and I am really sorry that I am questioning Your rules. Help me to be stronger. Please guide me continuously. I prayed for Your presence, and now I have You.

I know this should be enough. I'm sorry for wanting more.

I just don't want to lose him. :(

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 26, 2008 and is filed under . You can leave a response and follow any responses to this entry through the Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom) .


Nooooo. I've never met him, but nooooo! Not you 2. :(
*hugs* for strength and moral support and OMG KAYA NYO YANNNN! k? *hugs*

Aww thanks dear..:) *Hugs* you back!

Trying, trying. hope that it'll be better.:)

What the?!? So is it finally uh, over and done with?

We have sooo many things to talk about... Sorry i've been sooo busy the past few months.

No, we're still together... But I don't know, somehow, something's going wrong or I don't know.

It's okay, but we do need to catch up soon. Let me know when you can. Love you.:)

Oh no... I know how it is, one day you feel like you're invincible and everything's just PERFECT, and you ask yourself how you got so lucky to have found him... Then all of a sudden something goes wrong and it's like, your world is slowly falling apart.=(

I hope everything works out for you and him, though. And I sure hope he knows how lucky he is to be with a star like you. *hugs* or in your case, I'll double it. *hughugs*

Thanks haze!:) That was so uplifting!:)


Don't we all wish we could continue on living a storybook tale? Sadly, it's not the case for all of us!:(

Miss you!

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